Picking up all the pieces.

One hundred percent

2010-02-10T02:35:00.002+08:00

It's halfway past two and here I am typing away at a blank empty white space in front of me. I really don't know what to think and do anymore. I'm so caught up doing plenty of things, juggling many responsibilities, and dealing with numerous experiences all at the same time. For those who know how to possibly(and safely):

1.) Duplicate oneself
2.) Erase Specific memories (please be true eternal sunshine of the spotless mind)
3.) Raise productivity by 500% easily without tiring out
4.) Control Time (move it back and forth)
5.) Study without even opening a single book

please do give me a call. I really am in dire straits. Actually, not that dire but hey, you get the point I'm getting at. My life right now screams for a vacation - away from things familiar. The geography field trip next week sounds a great idea for starters and how I wish that I could go to Ilocos alone to just spend the weekend there without stress or anything(of course, you have to have some money to spend). I'm sure it would be one heck of an experience.

Earlier this morning, I found out that I had no class in my econ 191. Stupid as I am, I chose to stay and wait out the 4 hour break that life had promptly set-up for me. (I was there around 9am...next class at 1. :|) I chose to spend the break in the library to just relax and get my mind off of certain things. (for the past few days I've been disturbed by a lot of things. nuf said.) My friend cholo dropped by, cursed the world for the cancellation of the class, and every thing that could go wrong during this morning and decided to stay as well since he, like me, had nothing else to do. I pulled out a graphic novel out of my bag and decided to read out of 1, curiosity, and 2, boredom. I flipped the pages of the local graphic novel and began reading the piece. Before I knew it, I was already finished with the 250+ page graphic novel, in record time I might say. :)

The novel, after eden is a story about 6 people trying to find the meaning out of the ordinary. Each of the 6, are tired of the way life is going on cyclically and they are wanting to break away from the chains that bound them to their lives. (If you've been reading this blog of mine, you will have noticed by now why I liked this novel) To cut the long story short, it's about love, yet it explains the different human perceptions of the emotions and how life in itself acts upon and plays through that emotion creating a myriad of complex situations far too complicated for the mind to predict. (Whew!) After reading the book, everything for me went blank. I just remembered that I got home, ate dinner and rested. weird but true. Everything around me felt surreal. And to tell the truth, I've only been just awake for 1 hour. Insomnia or whatever you may call it.

"one motivation, one goal, one movement, one hundred percent."

That's me for this year. catchy isnt it? no i'm not running for elections - it's much grander than that.

I've been stuck in this place.

2010-02-08T21:30:00.004+08:00

I've been deep in thought. Well, for the past 2 years, I've been in this state wondering back and forth between rationality and surreality. Wondering if everything that had happened was real and all worth it. I've been thinking quite a lot recently about things that I've chosen and reading through past memories made me more confused about whether everything that had happened was really worth it. I know life is testing me at this moment, wanting me to choose the right path, wanting me to just look on ahead and never flinch at what is being thrown at me. It's hard to just look straight in the eyes of life and say "F**K off". But that's what life wants me to do, just for once, let me stand my ground and get everything straight in my life before I move on to another level.

I feel like I'm in a video game - nearing an upgrade of a weapon yet at the cost of the non-usage of the skills I've grown accustomed with the old weapon. It's a big decision standing your ground and say, come on, I'll take you on with no armor or security blanket on. But that's life, it attacks you when you're vulnerable and punish your weakness. I'm in this stage where I'm not so ready to give up the weapon to face enemies without anything and just persevere as "me" again. I'm confused, really, more than ever before.

And as the lines "where did I go wrong, I lost a friend, somewhere along the bitterness and I would've stayed up with you all night, had I known, how to save a life" play in the background, I see life laughing at the sulky fellow typing these words at the virtual space of the internet. I want to get back at the laughing metaphor and give him something to be sulky about.

I chatted with a friend regarding the situation and to say the least, I'm pacified.

Things would've been different if I had known how to save a life. Memories do give you the pages in which you can learn from, a secret book which you can count on when everything feels iffy. I just want to shed this skin which I'm so trapped in, locked by many barriers and shackled by a lot of things. Maybe in time, those shackles will be loose.

"ang gaganda ng sikat ng araw sa mga panahon ngayon. Look forward to better days." - C. B.

C.B., Thank you. :)

I would have stayed up with you all night had I known how to save a life...

I just had to write this. :)

2010-02-07T23:42:00.002+08:00

It was totally wild. I never expected it went that good of an event. Things are very very kind to me and I'm very thankful for that. I thought that I've been knocked down for good but it was life itself that brought me back to my feet. wohooo. good things come in bunches and especially to those deserving of it. I guess one wrong turn that I did was not that bad after all. It made me appreciate the scenery even more. Now getting back to the major highway. one turn at a time.

I know I've written this so many times before, but really. Its time. I've given this thing too much. Its time for myself.

au revoir..

P.S. J'ai besoin de l'inspiration pour mon sourire. Ma vie est bonne mais, je sais que c'est pas finir.

Time sure do fly fast

2010-02-02T00:53:00.003+08:00

It's nearly over, my third year in college and it's been one heck of a ride. Days are flying so fast that I havent noticed that it had been 3 years already. Everything felt like it was yesterday, that the acad oval was a two way road and that there were no classes during wednesday but the truth is, acad oval is now a one way road and there are classes during wednesdays. A lot have changed through those fast 3 years. I've met a lot of people and keep meeting wonderful souls along the way. I look back to where I was a year ago and I must say, I changed a lot.

I'm still looking for something though...

It's so damn good.

2010-01-21T19:08:00.001+08:00

just one phrase can describe the way I'm feeling about certain things right now and how it does things to a person:

It's so damn good.

There can't be anything more than that. It's the little things that life does to you that makes you stop and think, "I've been focusing too much on one item and I've been forgetting other things."

It's just too bad I can't have everything, but so far, i don't need everything. I just need...

I have been traveling

2010-01-11T01:17:00.002+08:00

Recently, people have been wondering where I am and why I am on such places in so little time. I find it really funny how they thought that I was out of the country in so little time and I'm traveling halfway around the world within a weekend and supposedly be back by Monday.

That gave me a thought... now that would be a nice way to spend a weekend, go across the world for a weekend and be back to resume your life when Monday comes. It is funny but now that I've thought of it, it would be one of the things I would do before I die.

Anyway, to clear things up, I'm right where I am, I haven't left the country and probably would not do so for the next year or so. Recently, I've been researching and finishing a report for my developmental econ class. We were asked to adopt a developing country and know its ins-and-outs. To make the story short, the numbers we present must tell a story of the country we adopt. I chose Chile without knowing that it is the top South American country and the 5th largest economy in the South Americas. For the past few days, I've been finishing my report and reports that I need to do for other subjects also set it, so I'm basically stuck at Chile for a few days then I'm off to my Japan report then back to my Philippine report which I started two weeks ago. I feel like I'm a tourist flying around the world. It's tiring but fun... viewing and reading charts, maps, and articles.

It's around 1:30am and still I'm awake. I've come to a conclusion that I wont finish my Chile report this night but I've made progress with my other report. I finish the Japanese report. Still, the big report for Chile must be finished by tomorrow.

Au revoir.

I've been panicking about my Chile report because Prof. Monsod told the class that one random student will report on the country he adopted on tuesday. ONE RANDOM Student. One Student I can take, but ONE RANDOM...at least by the end of the day, one student will be relieved of the report and others will still continue to tremble hoping that they will(or maybe not) be next.

Le premier!

2010-01-05T22:29:00.003+08:00

Life has taught us that love does not consist in gazing at each other, but in looking outward together in the same direction

- Antoine de Saint-Exupery

(disclaimer) As promised, the first post of this year would be a long one.

It's the start of a new decade and frequently I have been noticing a lot of people posting things like their new-year's resolutions in their facebook pages or whatever. I've come to ask myself, at the end of the year, do people even look back on the resolutions they have made at the start of the year? If you would ask me, since I can remember, I could not remember any one year that I made a resolution and stuck through til the end. Now that I'm on that thought, sometimes, I did not even need a resolution to change or resolve some part of me, things just, well, did what they have to do and went its own course...naturally.

That's what I think people must do, let things go its own course. Subconsciously, we would fix ourselves of the things we deem that we need to fix. Like a river, we would try our best to wash out anything within us and just flow freely. Resolutions maybe are just an excuse that people make to give themselves a better start for the year, though more often than not, those are promises just sworn to the wind and never realized.

You may ask why I've put a quote above before the post actually began. The quote I posted above has a little story in it. It amazed me when I realized it, but hey, life works to help you bit by bit in ways you can't even predict.

It all began about a few days ago before classes even started. I went with my relatives to MOA partly because I need to go somewhere other than our house and partly because they need a tour guide there. Since I was the only one who had the time then to accompany them to MOA, I went along. When we got there, I they just asked me questions how to get to this and that place so I just pointed the directions to those places they need to go. I then asked permission for me to go around and explore the place a bit. There is a thing in me that goes around the mall looking for things which I think I need to buy soon, so I make it a habit to check out certain stores and update myself of the prices of the things that I would save for. So you may now have an idea that I got the quote from a bookstore, well, nope. By the time I got tired of walking around, I went looking for a place to sit and well tie my shoe laces as well. I found such a place and thats where I found the quote accidentally. I sat down and as I tied my shoe laces I noticed a piece of blank stationary with the quote inscribed on it. It was just there. As far as I remembered, there were no people beside me as I tied my shoe laces and there were no people prior to my activity there. It was just there maybe left by a kid or someone who accidentally peeled it off. Anyway, I read the paper from the floor and just logged the quote in my phone and once I got home i typed it in the net to search for its author and voila, the little prince's author popped out.. (I have a habit of doing such things when I find something interesting)

You may now wonder why this is interesting right? Well, if you guess that I'm in love or anything, you are totally on the wrong side of the road my friend. That quote got my attention because it came at a time when I was trying to look for reasons...reasons why things happen the way they are, why things flow like that. Love for me is one mystery that, no matter how many quotes or how many poems I read, or no matter how many songs about love I listened to, stories about past/present/future love from friends that have been shared to me, I won't understand fully. It is what makes it all the more interesting, all the more worth it.

For some, the experience of love has been tiring, sad, happy, or a mixture of emotions but everyone admitted that love is one thing they won't forget. well for me, love is just the thing people are searching for even if deep inside they are full of it, waiting to give it to someone else. It's something to be given, kept, and treasured.

As George Sand stated:

Il n'y a qu'un bonheur dans la vie, c'est d'aimer et d'être aimé.
(There is only one happiness in life, to love and be loved.)

As the new year starts, be it that we have a resolution or not, let's just keep in mind that love, though sometimes painful, is one thing that would make our year right. :)

P.S. I really can't tell why I wrote about love on the very first post this year. I guess life just wanted this to happen. and I just surrender myself to the flow of it like a river flowing to the vast openness of the sea. never looking back, never slowing down, just taking its course, wanting to be freed from all restrictions.

Au revoir!

New year.

2010-01-04T20:18:00.000+08:00

Just one thing... Things are looking up. New post in about a few days. Bonne Annee :)

Last post for 2009

2009-12-26T23:39:00.002+08:00

You read the title right, this is my last post for the year. It has been a wonderful year for me to say the least and the happy moments outshine all those that only motivated me to grow by means of sorrow. This year, I can say is my most memorable(so far) in my entire life. Never have I stated that fact before. But right now, 2009 is my most memorable year. It runs through a lot of different reasons but it boils down to only 3 and you can pretty much know what my life has been like this 2009. I know it's childish to state the reasons in this blog, but hey, it's my last post for the year, might as well.

So here goes:
1.) 2009 has been the year I felt more independent than ever before.

I've been noticing that I've been doing things on my own that I've never done before. I can blame it with the age but seriously, I've never felt so independent before it's as if I'm already working and making big decisions. I've long searched for this feeling of independence - my parents trusting me with my decisions, letting me do stuff for my own, leaving me to tackle things in my own way. To some extent, it molded me to be who I am today. I'm me.

2.) 2009 opened my eyes to some of the realities that I've been trying to hide from.

Innate in humans, we all have cobwebs and spiderwebs lurking behind our closets. We try our very hard to escape those cobwebs and hide under our own safety pillows. This year brought about a series of events that made me step over the edge and take a leap of faith by finally believing that I can and thankfully, and, as far as it is going, my faith is not failing me. I'm still leaping and I'm taking reality as far as it goes.

3.) ...

the third reason is something I keep for myself. This reason is the main thing why I make 2009 the most memorable year so far in my 20 year journey in this earth. As you might have noticed, I'm not really the person you can decipher in one sweep or uncover with one or even more meetings. Even my closest friends tell me that I'm a hard nut to crack, and what i'm thinking is hard to guess. I guess they are right, only a few people can read who I am that easily. I don't know why, but I tend to be very secretive with my life, only uncovering the most private parts to the closest of my friends. The third reason is somewhat related to this and I'm leaving it at that.

As I leave this post to a close, I would like to take this opportunity to thank everyone for reading my blog and I wish you all a happy holiday season. God Bless and thank you.

Au revoir!

P.S. I finally was able to register. :)

Im tired of the fantasy.

2009-12-19T03:38:00.003+08:00

It is inherent for humans to beg for the fantasy, the unreal, the ideal, the dreamy, and the surreal...

I'm tired of the fantasy, because it doesn't really exist. And there are never really any surprises, and it never really...Delivers. And I'm tired of it. And I'm tired of everything else for that matter.

It is just obvious that everyone of us, begs to be in a famous happy ending scene strolling into the sunset(hey, isn't that painful for the eyes?). But let's get real here, how many of us get to do so? There's probably just a minute percentage of people who would actually say yes to that. But if there's one thing that keeps people believing in fantasies is that they may come true by some freak chance. It's like winning the lottery but winning is winning right, whether the odds are stacked against you or not.

I've come to a point where fantasies aren't what I really need right now. These things, though sometimes push me to my best, are, sad to say, distractions to what's ahead of me. I don't know what's with me, but I seem to get lost within one fantasy and forget what's really real. I became so obsessed with the ideal that I lost track with what's there in front of me and thus having a problem I didn't have to face.

Anyway, things so far have been kind to me. Everything is looking up and maybe soon enough, I'll be tired of getting tired of the fantasy. We are after all human, unpredictable, mundane, real. Good night :)

Au revoir.

tagged

2009-12-12T23:05:00.002+08:00

tagged by doreen... anyway im bored so what the heck

1. Put your iTunes, Windows Media Player, etc. on shuffle.
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS.
4. Tag 20 friends (make me #21 so I can see your results). [Kulang ang friends ko, apparently =))]
5. Everyone tagged has to do the same thing.
6. Have Fun!

IF SOMEONE SAYS 'ARE YOU OKAY' YOU SAY?
- Take Me Home - Bone Thugs

HOW WOULD YOU DESCRIBE YOURSELF?
- I need a Girl - P.Diddy ft. Usher

WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL?
- Wonderful World - James Morrison

HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY?
- Calling all Angels - Train

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE'S PURPOSE?
- Seasons of Love - Rent

WHAT'S YOUR MOTTO?
- As long as you love me - Backstreet boys (WTF!?)

WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
- Sunday Morning - Maroon 5

WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
- What them Girls like - Ludacris ft. Chris Brown

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?
- In the middle - jimmy eats world

WHAT IS 2 + 2?
- thinking of you - katy perry

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND?
- Iris - Goo goo dolls

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?
- Sa piling nya - Paramita

WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
- If everyone cared - nickelback

WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
- Higher - Creed

WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?
- Leap of Faith - Hale

WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?
- The Best you never had - Leona Lewis

WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST?
- Just Dance - Lady Gaga

WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST FEAR?
- Betamax - Sandwich

WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST SECRET?
- Secret Valentine - We the Kings

WHAT DO YOU WANT RIGHT NOW?
- An Invitation - Urbandub

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?
- Liwanag sa Dilim- Rivermaya

WHAT WILL YOU POST THIS AS?
- Anonymous - Bobby V

borrowed poetry part 2.

2009-12-12T22:42:00.002+08:00

Are you looking for answers
To questions under the stars?
Well, if along the way
You are grown weary
You can rest with me until
A brighter day and you're okay

I am no Superman
I have no answers for you
I am no hero
Oh, that's for sure
But I do know one thing
Is here you are is where I belong
I do know where you go
Is where I want to be

borrowed poetry from Dave Matthews Band :)

It's one of the few times I've come to appreciate a deep song whilst exuding a simple message. :)

Here they go again!

2009-12-12T20:18:00.003+08:00

Its truly Christmas.

No matter how weird the weather may seem during these past days, it is an obvious sight that Christmas is almost here. The vast displays of flickering lights and the seemingly competitive nature of neighbors trying to outdo each other by putting up the most extravagant and the most intricate Christmas decor outside their already decorated and glowing houses. Also, the songs have already been playing everywhere, songs which remind each and everyone of us various memories of Christmas past. Just a few minutes ago, while in the car, a song played and everybody in car (me, my mom and my dad) sang almost instantly, it was one of those moments you can't trade for anything else in this world.

Now moving on, Christmas has and always been my favorite holiday. The cold weather, the festive atmosphere and the distinct smell in the air saying that it's gonna be a few more days since the start of another vacation. Thing is, for a time now, my days have been oh so quick, I guess it's just my body clock adjusting to the hectic schedule of everyday life. BUT, yes, a big but... my personified yet imagined body is screaming at the person it is trapped in saying GIVE ME A DAMN REST. If my body could really talk to me right now, he won't in disgust and anguish because of the treatment I'm giving it - a slave in his own world. The only reprieve my body has is number 1, when it sleeps, or 2, when it eats. (what's with me talking about my body in the third person...?)

In recent days, I've been splurging in crepes and the recent crepe session was a complete failure. I just felt depressed, well, the two of us actually(my friend and I). These crepe sessions have kept my sanity up these past few days. I really just want to stay at home and rest all the while but it's one of those moments when I want to go just for that, not only for the Crepe but also the company of a friend or friends.

Now back to Christmas.

People know that Christmas is nearing because of one thing - Carolers. Yes, the nightly kid-revelers singing the same old song over and over again trying to get a few pennies for their efforts. I'd have to give it to those kids, they really try - well good luck in trying for I won't bother. It's one thing for the kids to really try their best, but if their best is having to break a few mirrors in the process, well that's a different story. I am somewhat irritated when they try to sing the all so familiar song in such a way that you know that their version is a new version than the one they sang a year ago, that their version is more weirder, more well...chinese. Just a few hours ago, a kid sang in front of the gate the same song...and guess what, I didn't actually understand a thing he said. wow. I didn't know if it was my dog serenading us with her barking while the kid was singing or its just the singing but one thing was sure - I DID NOT UNDERSTAND A THING HE SAID.

On a lighter note, well this year, poor-tiered carolers are a bit low on supply. I guess they had the while year last year to refine their vocal skills. It's those that I want to hear on a cold windy night, not the same old song sang over and over again. And don't get me started on carolers using station ids on their songs. it's too irritating hearing those in TV and these kids whip up a version live at your doorstep. sheesh, can they sing a much better song?

Anyway, as the saying says, to each his own. As I look back on the days that have passed, I think that I'm thinking too much. I haven't been able to appreciate the finer things and the smaller details. Hopefully soon enough I will. :)

Well, it's gonna be Christmas a few days from now and I'm really really excited about it. It's not what's gonna happen during Christmas. It's CHRISTMAS ITSELF. now time to save up!

au revoir. :)

Second Chance?

2009-12-12T02:08:00.002+08:00

It's about 2am and I'm still up. These past few days made me think(again) about how to live my life in these coming years. As I meet people whoa re younger than me in my classes, I've come to notice that really, it's time for me to finally grow up. I'm on my 3rd year in college and in less than 24 months, I'll be graduating. It scares me how I will face the world after UP.I'm sure there are a lot of possibilities out there for me, but there's this side of me that always worries about everything and right now, that's my biggest worry. Time is definitely trying to made me realize everything faster than what I want.

Just this morning, I wrote a message in a birthday card of a friend. While writing, I asked my friend(not the one with the birthday) regarding students who entered college while they were 15...almost 3 years before I(and my batch as well in Claret) entered college at 17/18. The conversation was short, but the thing is, it made me ponder for a while did I make the most out of those years and is it worth it. Up to now,I still haven't decided if everything was worth it and I'm still caught between trying to decide if I made the most out of those years. Frankly, things have been fast-paced, dragging me lane after lane swerving back and forth in a highway leading to who knows what. As I said to a friend,

Bro, my life as everybody knows it, is one hell of a roller-coaster ride.

It's too fast paced for me - things, everything.

I wish I had a remote control that dictates how time would pass. The roller-coaster ride is already taking its toll on me. Right now, everything for me is uncertain, everything is in shambles. I'd like to take control of it but I'm helpless. I don't how the hell I got myself into this situation. Anyway, I have no regrets, in fact, for a second there, I was thankful because without these, I won't grow as a person. Now have I grown far too much?

There are a lot of things that I want a second chance at...there are a lot of things that I would want to change, want to correct, want to finish. There are a lot of wants in my life and there are even a lot more what ifs. I guess that's where this roller-coaster ride is taking me for this part of my life- the want to's and what if's. Everybody deserves a second chance at everything right? But, after that chance is wasted, would there be another one? Is it right to let things just pass because you know more - that you understand everything clearer than last time? There are so many chances in this world that people just overlook.

I'll leave with a line from a song:

"Are you looking for answers to questions under the stars?
Well, if along the way you are grown weary
You can rest with me until a brighter day and you're okay "

thanks for reading. :)
au revoir!

The Space between

2009-12-09T23:20:00.002+08:00

Just a few days ago, I downloaded "the space between" by Dave Mathews Band. It was one of those moments when I just stared at the computer and searched for songs to download to pass the time. The first time I played the song, a line struck me almost instantly

"The space between your heart and mine is the space we'll fill with time"

I decided to search for the lyrics of the song after I heard that line. It turned out the song had a pretty deep meaning - that no matter what lies people say, the feelings inside of them still remain. Whatsoever the people in a relationship say to each other - negative or not, there's still something that keeps the two together.

The space between the tears we cry is the laughter keeps us coming back for more

I just had to share that line, two ironic feelings in a single line blending together to form a simple message easily understood by all. I don't know what got into me tonight, but thinking about that made me ask a lot of questions about relationships. It's a wonderful thing, relationships, but, why don't they always work out and save everyone the feeling of being heartbroken? I guess I'm just delving too much on a matter that is better left untouched.

I haven't got anything much to say anymore. I've been busy with things as of late, in fact, I don't even have time for myself. BUt, a once in a while crepe treatment is always a welcome sight :) I still have to write 10 sentences in french about the country of my dreams :) anyway, bonne soiree!

au revoir!

2009-11-29T20:43:00.003+08:00

Nostalgia.

I just got home. I am tired but the experience today brought back memories, not any specific memory but any general memory I had of high school. Early today, I accompanied my brother in a birthday celebration/gimik day of his classmate. As in any adolescent, growing, teen boys group there are always things inherent to them and this exactly brought back memories back when I was in his age and I was just as excited as him going to parties and events like this with friends outside the walls of the school. It was fun actually, though I never showed my brother that I was enjoying seeing them do their own thing - movies - timezone- PC - timezone. Kids stuff to me but everything was real fun for them. Seeing the smiles on their faces begging for time to stop so that the game they were all in would not stop was priceless.

It made me stop and wonder, did I really enjoy my childhood the way my brother is enjoying his right now? Well, come to think of it, I did, but in a totally different way. You see, I was an only child for 8 whole years, yes, 8 years. My status as an only child gave me everything I want, but there is something that I didn't get to have as much as my brother is having right now - playmates. the whole 8 years I was the ONLY child of the FAMILY - BOTH SIDES. So what does that unfold for me, well for starters, I hang out with people much much older than I am. As a result, my view in life was really a bit out of the ordinary as far as my age generation was concerned. It's not that I didn't have friends in school but it is very different at school and at home. At school, we all assumed the never-ending psyche that play-time would never ever end, with each other starting a match that would ignite everyone's tickle bone. At home, on the contrary, play time begins and ends with me- with console in hand. It's a sad situation at home - it's me, myself, and I. I guess you know how the feeling was at that time. It's somewhat the drawback of being the only child of the family, yeah sure you are spoiled but there will sure be something missing.

I guess I envy the kind of experiences my brother is experiencing right now they are those I wish I would've had but i guess my personality and circumstances did not allow me to experience those and that's a different story all together. Today was I guess an eye opener to the contrast in my personality and lifestyle, and my brother's. We are two sides of a coin - he is the total opposite of me, seriously. He is so carefree, happy-go-lucky and seems like he doesn't care at all at the world. I could not blame him though, he is still young and has yet to be exposed to such realities of life.

Okay, so my brother and his friends watched Paranormal activity, yes, that movie. I had no choice but to accompany him inside because my mom won't allow him to watch a movie alone. That being the case, I seated in a different row. Watching that film for a 3rd time was somewhat boring and I realized that the camera angles are really dizzying. Ugh. My head was aching a bit half through the movie for a reason I can't really figure, my brother and his friends loud commotion a few rows down or the goofy camera angles. Their commotion even caused another viewer to reprimand their noise. Wow, kids these days, even in a movie they could not keep their opinions and reactions in a less audible level. I just chuckled at that thought - Kids are kids.

Nostalgia was running through my mind all the time I was there. Coffee did not help erasing the thought that I was getting old and in a few semesters I would be graduating. Oh my, time sure do fly fast when you are in college. Proverbial statements are coming from friends going - it's like yesterday we were just in the first year and we were taking math17, hanging out together, running under the rain just to get to another building.

time...tick tock, tick tock.

I just have to admit that my time in college is almost over. My childhood has long past, and I have to face a new way of life. I know the future will be dashing. I'll be another person once I face that future. I'm certain.

au revoir!

au revoir!

2009-11-29T01:15:00.002+08:00

Things have slowed down for me during the past days. For the nth time, weekends have saved me from the life I chose for myself. I really can't thank God for creating weekends for people who are in need of rest (comme moi!). It's really fascinating how a simple weekend could reset things in a snap. Don't you think so?

I look again at the blinking line in front of me thinking of words to write. There are just times when the reset button actually resets everything you need to say. Its around 1:20am and I guess, this is it for now.

I'll do this again tomorrow morning. :)

au revoir

I'm agitated.

2009-11-25T20:53:00.002+08:00

It's the first time I will say this on this blog. I'm really frustrated, agitated, irritated, tired, and sick of everything that has happened. I mean, there are things that could be accepted in this world but that kind is something else.. I'll leave it to that.

I guess there are just circumstances that no matter how you make things easier for everybody, these circumstances would really get to your nerves and make everything a living hell. Thank God for true friends who are always ready to listen to you 24/7, a trusty Mp3 player, dozens of pages to read(yuck, but yes), jokes from a wacky gang, a windy and cold weather, dozens of stories from a few friends, catching up with an old acquaintance, getting to know a person better, a few cups of coffee, internet and a heaping serving of mint-choco ice cream with cheese-cake bits, bananas and strawberry syrup all wrapped in a semi-crisp crepe. yum.

anyways, though my day was pretty f****d from the start, it ended on a nice note...french class and a really obscene discussion in a public place! hahahaha! that made my day.

2009-11-16T01:59:00.002+08:00

Time for a new post. :)

Before anything else, I would like to say that this post will not be about the recent win of Mr. Pacquiao. :) Sorry, but kudos to the fella though, he really brought his game to his opponent.

Anyway, my first week in the second semester is finally over and I just have to say that this week moved ever so slowly. I don't know if it was due to the fact that I go home when the night has already settled in or what. I just felt that my week moved slowly. Well, that brought me a nice idea to write on - how things seem to run slowly.

I'll write about that on the next blogpost.

I have a lot of things to do, my schedule demands my attention 24/5 yep. I have 2 days off. I force myself to not do anything on those 2 days and gut it out the remaining 5 days of the week. all work and no relaxation makes me a very very sad and tired boy.

think of it this way, stressed + fatigue - (fun+rest) = self-inflicted murder. soooo there. I need this. But i'm pretty sure that in the coming weeks, that will happen. In fact, the only thing missing for that equation to come true is the negation of the fun part. ugh.

Oh well, I gotta go and be a student again. I have yet to put to notes all the necessary data needed for my economics subject and I still have to edit a paper in my french class. at least a ray of sunlight shined on me before I went home last friday.

Bonne chance trick!

2009-11-10T19:22:00.002+08:00

This semester is looking pretty cold. literally.

I started out the day knowing that my first two classes will be in the new classrooms of the School of Economics. These classrooms are reputedly nice so I know my semester will be in comfort. I'll post pictures of the rooms here within the next few days. I never imagined that those rooms would be cold as hell even though I'm at the far side of the room.

Early this morning, I stepped into the already air-condition-cooled room hoping that there would be no first class for my second semester. Though I'm really excited that my first class would be taught by Prof. Solita Monsod, I was not into the "study-mood" self I want myself to be in. So I sat there at the corner waiting for time to pass by and hit the halfway mark between 10 and 11. But much to my dismay, she arrived around 5 minutes before that mark. Anyways her subject is the one I wanted to take since the start of my econ life but due to schedule problems - my schedule hating me, I wasn't. Moving on, after the first class in one of the new econ classrooms, the next was in another new econ classroom(just finished a semester ago). I was shocked to see the interior of this classroom. It felt like I was in a hotel conference room or one of those classrooms abroad. It was totally NICE. I felt sleepy during this time due to the fact that again, it is damn cold, and next, the hour was not friendly to the avid learner.

After two classes in the school of economics, i expected to be in fresh-air zone for my next class. But wait, hello trick, think again. another cold classroom. COME ON. I was trying to keep myself awake because of the time and because of the cool atmosphere. Good thing the class was lively and noisy, to say the least that it helped me in keeping my consciousness up.

After the class, I barely have time to run to CAL and jog up the 10 flights of stairs for my last class of the day. The climb to the 5th floor of that building was staggering. Well, right now, I was expecting another cold classroom because maybe, another lucky break for me. It was an aircon-ed actually...

AIR-CONTINUOUS.

so much for the first day of classes. btw, tomorrow, I am sure of another airconditioned room and that cursed aircontinuous room in CAL. (i have 4 days of french this semester due to the integrated nature of the class im taking)

Alors voila...

Au revoir!

2009-11-10T06:15:00.002+08:00

Any distraction, a few days before the start of classes is always welcome.

It was just one of those times when everything went loose for a moment. I had nothing to worry about except enjoying myself with the company of friends.

on to other thoughts...

I hate how humans have the capacity to choose something they are not comfortable with.

2009-11-08T08:23:00.002+08:00

I happen to be "tagged" in facebook in this note so I decided to answer this questionnaire here. Well, it eases my mind by answering these mundane questions. hehe so here goes... just a bit of a reprieve from things familiar - or not.

This is all about your current course in college. ONLY COLLEGE STUDENTS ARE REQUIRED TO ANSWER THIS.
Answer this if you're tagged.

1. Anong course mo?
- BS Economics

2. Saan ka nag-aaral?
- UP Diliman

3. Napilitan ka lang bang kunin yang course na yan?
- No!

4. Sino nag-papaaral sayo?
- Parents, and the state - so they say

5. Anong year mo na?
- 3rd year.(i'm old)

6. Nag-eenjoy ka ba sa college life mo?
- Yes...and no.

7. Eh, sa college barkada?
- Yes!!!

8. First college friends?
- E1.

9. First college boyfriend/girlfriend?
- hahaha is this even a question?

10. Ano yung top 2 choices mo na course?
- BS Business Economics - BS Economics. (not much of a choice e?)

11. Have you ever felt out of place at school?
- Nope

12. Irreg ka ba o regular?
- NO! ON TIME!

13. May crush ka sa school mo?
- yes? hahaha!

14. Favorite subject?
- French. Econ(yes econ)

15.Sang subject ka natutulog?
- none (believe me, i love sleeping but I seem to have trouble sleeping while sitting in a chair)

16.Pinakahate mong subject?
- ECON (nuf said. we have a love-hate relationship)

17.Kilala ba skul mo?
- YUP

18.Ever thought of taking up nursing?
- NOT A CHANCE.

19.Gusto mo bang magshift?
- Nope. I love Econ.(plastic. hahaha)

20.Anong course naman?
- refer to the question above.svp

21.Do you miss your highschool life?
- Yes...

22.Anong balak mong unang gawin pagkagraduate mo?
- go abroad and study

23.San ka naman magttrabaho?
- in a good corporation or an embassy(no, not the club!)

24.Do u have plans of going abroad?
- Yes! I WANT ASAP.

25.10 years from now ano ka na?
- uhhmmm..still human I guess.

26.Do you love college life?
- it's cool.

27.Anong gusto mong gift ang matanggap mo sa graduation mo?
- cash. :P lots and lots of cash. 7 figures pde?

28.May bf/gf ka ba?
- hahahaha wala.

29.Recent school problem?
- Why is my 1st sem grade so low compared to the second sem...every year.

30.Pinakahate mong prof?
- so far, wala.

31. Pinakafavorite mong prof?
- Prof. de Dios or Prof. Capili.

32. Crush mong prof?
- wahahahaha wala.

33. Crush mong kaklase
- hmm wala e

34. Pinakakaclose mong college friends?
- kada. :P

35. Anong oras ka natutulog?
- it depends on what i'm doing. it ranges from 11-2:30...am

LSS

2009-11-07T17:32:00.003+08:00

I miss the sound of your voice...

If I could walk on water...

If I could tell you whats next....

pull me down hard and drown me in love...

make you believe...

make you forget...

~borrowed poetry from Matt Nathanson (come on get higher).

Enrollment done.

2009-11-05T18:51:00.003+08:00

Promise, this time, I'll keep this post short and brief.

Today, I officially finished my registration process for the second semester. It's been a tiring 3 days and I feel for those who are still registering and lining up for prized subjects.

My message to you, Kaya yan! You'll get through it.

Our problems are man-made, therefore they may be solved by man. And man can be as big as he wants. No problem of human destiny is beyond human beings.

~John F. Kennedy

lessons.

2009-11-03T22:13:00.006+08:00

I had a very interesting day today. As the song Five candles plays in the background, I look back on the things that happened in this day only to realize that this day was not one of those "just-gonna-pass-by" types of days. A lot of things happened today and it seemed safe to say that I learned a lot - whether essential or otherwise. :) so as the chorus of the song now runs through my head, I guess it is proper to just state what happened today.

"You were there when I needed you. You were there when the skies broke wide wide open"

When I woke up today, it seemed that it will be just one of those registration days filled with nothing but fatigue and the usual bother of lining up for hours. (note: I only went to UP today to get my form5a and hopefully to get advised because I believed that I was on probation - meaning my grade in econ was lower than 2.5 :-s) So when I got to UP this morning, there was really no excitement in me being there. I thought that I would just go straight to the office for advising (note again: In UPSE, there are no advisers for regular and non-delinquent students. There is no pre-advising and advising sessions, instead students put "self-advised" in thier form5s). I don't know what got into me but I just decided to check the masterlist just to make things official to me. 'Til that point, I am still certain that I would not be in that master list. To my surprise, MY NAME WAS THERE. Good Event #1!

I met up with a friend, Cholo to check things with regard to his enrollment - subjects, schedules ETC. He was also surprised to find out that I was not on probation since I got a low grade in econ 131 the previous sem. (okay...not fun) So I accompanied him in his line to get his form5a since the lines for the juniors and the freshmen were on the other side of the building and the line was practically nonexistent due to the small number of juniors and freshmen. After lining up, we contacted our friend, Angelo who was in the other end of the world trying to get his grades in Trinity. Anyways, we all decided to meet in trinoma to watch something fun - 500 days of Summer. Good Event #2!

I already watched 500 days of summer at home and I would really want to watch it at the cinemas so I was excited to watch it. I guess I really can relate to that movie. The plot, which aimed to deconstruct, or strengthen further (well I leave the deciding to you) the concept of "fate" really touched my heart based on personal experiences. Plus, the story really had a good twist to it. It's like it was based on a true story, not the typical "this-would-only-happen-in-the-movies" scenario. The movie felt, well, I don't know...real. The humor within the movie can appeal to anyone and it delivers a deep message that would only be appreciated when you understand the situation the characters are in. I'll leave a line in the movie later in this blogpost for everyone to appreciate.

After the rendezvous at the mall. We decided first to check the movie schedules and then all the usual stuff. A weird and funny thing happened to us near the Jack's Loft store outside. For a weird reason, we somehow came upon a couple making out in daylight at the corner of a mall. Okay, I know PDA but what they did was hilarious. They were apparently hiding behind a column or a pillar and if it hadnt for Angelo going to the direction of the Pillar, we wouldn't have noticed them doing anything. When the two people emerged from the column, we can't help but laugh and we kinda felt sorry for the two. I guess somehow, we ruined their moment of "PRIVACY". It was really surprising how they could fit themselves behind the pillar with a space big enough for only one person. Oh well, pag init ka nga naman. GO GET A ROOM OKAY?

Next up, some gay dude suddenly barged into our conversation when it hit the topics of gay guys. I guess the poor dude was apparently affected when we stumbled upon that topic. But who is he anyway to barge in right? We were talking and the topic was not really about gays we just stumbled upon an example who was apparently gay. oh well, we just laughed at the situation but that was really weird and bothering.

So after stating what happened, I learned a few things...(to my surprise)

1.) STUDY STUDY STUDY. You cannot afford to give yourself unnecessary stress come enrollment time especially with your majors subjects, even more so if it meant your staying with your college.

2.) EXPECT THE UNEXPECTED. Sometimes, your worries aren't really worry-worthy after all. You are better off trying to accept whatever will come your way. As a movie stated, there is no such this as fate - everything is coincidence and its up to us to make do with whatever coincidence will come our way

3.) NEVER EVER HIDE BEHIND A PILLAR IN A PUBLIC PLACE. Come on. There has to be a better place than hiding behind a pillar doing things that should be done in private. Please please, not in broad daylight. GET A ROOM

4.) NEVER BARGE INTO ANYONE's CONVERSATION. This is self-explanatory. Don't be rude. It really reflects your personality. Plus, if you're only trying to attract attention, go jump off a building for crying out loud. Pft.

5.) LONELINESS IS UNDERRATED. Nah, i didn't learn this by myself, it was stated in the movie. well, it made sense actually. You really can't understand loneliness unless you've experienced it...

so there...

au revoir!

"I love how she makes me feel. Like anything is possible. Like...I don't know...Like LIFE IS WORTH IT."

the day before the revolution

2009-11-02T10:07:00.004+08:00

As promised, a new post. :)

I woke up early today after a 10-hour sleeping marathon which was somewhat a luxury for me (and yes, my kind as well). The last days of october are really the most tiring for me each year. It has proven itself to be nonstop, intense, and absolutely draining. Yeah maybe I'm just overreacting on that part but really, it is tiring like hell. It has always given me 40+ hours of no sleep apart from the fatigue it will give me. It has always started during October 31 wherein my ninang and I usually go to the cemetry early to fix everything there with the caretaker (leave some stuff, tents, ETC). Afterwards we would usually go to the grocery to buy food or whatever item we would need for the night. Usually, during October 31, my ninang and I would spend the night in the cemetery. We would be the official guards of lolo's grave for the night. Call it night-shift. For the past 3 or so years, I've been making a run of not sleeping through the night, and also, for that same 3 or so years, my ninang has been sleeping through the night so its always me who'd stay up late. (I digressed sorry) Anyways, before going to the cemetery on October 31, I would usually do my own stuff for the day since at night, I won't be at home so I don't get the chance to sleep or rest for that matter. After the night watch at the cemetery, since we would likely be the first (my ninang and I) to be at watch, we would be the first to leave when my parents arrive. We would only stay around 45mins after my parents arrive then we would set sail for home. After settling in for a few minutes I would begin preparing for the visit to my other lolo's grave. (Mother side) and that's basically the day I guess.

Well, the tiring part is not really that bothering to me. I love being on the move and being productive. Its just that I so love to sleep and not sleeping turns my mood in all the wrong places. Pft. I guess that I really don't have much of a choice. There are bright sides to not sleeping and going to various cemeteries after all. to start things off and maybe the most important is well, you get to spend time paying respects to relatives who have passed on. next is you get the time to appreciate what you have, trust me, you will have a moment. For the last one, I guess I will only say "LOOK UP". Well thats basically Halloween for me.

On to an interesting thought... nowadays, trick or treating has became somewhat of a fad and I really don't understand the reason why people are forcing that culture into our own. Seriously speaking -

DO FILIPINOS EVEN KNOW THE TRADITION OF TRICK OR TREATING?!?

This is what I know about trick or treating: Trick or treating was based on souling, or the visiting of poor people and children to people to say prayers for the dead in exchange for food. This tradition, from what I know, originated in Ireland and Britain. And this tradition migrated to the US by means of the Irish settlers. That's everything I know about trick or treating.

So you may ask about why am I writing about trick or treating? A few days ago, while I was watching a movie, kids knocked on our gate and said trick or treat. OKAY. TRICK OR TREAT!? then a thought came into my mind, my professor 2 semesters ago told a really interesting story. His story told of how he asked children about the trick or treat they were doing when children knocked on his gate. The children were apparently dumbfounded by my professors question and they ran to their parents. The children's parents then confronted the poor professor and in reply he asked the same question to the parents. The parents were also dumbfounded much to the surprise of the class. So we asked our prof what was his question, it turned out to be a simple one -

"Pano pag trick? Alam niyo ba yang ginagawa niyo? (So what if it was trick? Do you know what you are doing?")

Yeah, that was the question. So apparently the children and their parents have a reason to be dumbfounded. I guess, they really don't understand what they are trying to do. The professor explained the reason why he asked that question and I guess the parents understood what he was saying - that trick or treat is not truly "Filipino" and us doing it is somewhat trying hard to be westerners. My professor was right.

Now as that thought came running to my minds I wanted to say the same thing to the kids saying trick or treat outside the gate. Well, I guess my laziness pushed through and spared the kids of a dumbfounding question they won't forget and saved me a branding by other people. So come to think of it, people are forcing trick or treating into our culture. I'm not saying that it is wrong, but please do let the people understand what they are getting themselves into. Its a weak argument but its the kids who will suffer a somewhat embarrassing moment when they would come upon a witty professor or a moody guy who will ask them questions about what they are doing.

I think we should have our own identity when it comes to our halloween traditions. I know there are but nowadays its the western traditions that are becoming mainstream and seriously, its saddening. But i guess that's globalization and there's no stopping that. I just hope that someday our traditions will be embraced as well by our own fellow. Who can blame the kids by the way, instead of singing their lungs out during christmas only to be rewarded by at most, 5pesos, they only say 3 words, then they get candies in return. In econ terms, the indifference curve of trick or treating is on a higher level of satisfaction than that of the caroling's curve. Plus it is more efficient in terms of effort, a song vs 3 words?! give that to me and i'll take it ANYDAY.

So there. that's basically my weird halloween. I just hope the carolers wouldnt show up at our gates soon. It's a totally different story when it comes to carolers. Just the first line of that famous caroling song ticks me off bigtime. but that's another entry. so there thanks for reading

au revoir!

(note: this blog was written in 2 parts. :))
(P.S. I did tell the kids that I don't have candy and they should move on to a house with decor rather than a mundane apartment which looked like it could need a treat of its own. Their costumes were okay though, dressed up as some dead guy and some bloody girl (with chaperons casually dressed for a party hahaha) and they were really expecting candy from me. Sorry!)

I'm back :)

2009-11-01T19:03:00.003+08:00

I'll promise Ill post something worthwhile tomorrow sorry. My head is still in the clouds after around 48 hours of no sleep. so...yeah. i feel like im surfing while im hitting a muffler of a car. damn. humithithit ng tambutso hahha oh well sorry sabaw.

a demain!

au revoir. bonne soiree

P.S. Upon further thinking its not 48 hours but around 40 or so hours only. hehehe. i did sleep 4 hours 2 nights ago.

At the wake of the typhoon(?)

2009-10-31T10:31:00.003+08:00

Good morning!

The sun is up and the weather is chilly. As of today, news reports say that the typhoon has been spotted in the sea - which is a good sign, since weather will be clearing up in a few hours time. It's October 31 and frankly, I really don't feel going to the cemetery later on because of the weather conditions (windy and rainy - perfect sleeping conditions).

Last nights winds were really gusting. I can feel the neighbor's GI roof peel again and again. It was actually scary to hear metal crumple like that against the force of the wind. While I was scared because of the neighbor's near-delinquent roof, I was downstairs watching a movie, yes a movie - in the middle of a signal no.3 that hit the Metro. I was half focused while watching because there are a lot of things running through my mind and the movie was just a way to mask all my worries.I really had a lot to worry about, first, the kitchen might overflow again(which happened 3 storms ago) next, I had to raise all the kitchen appliances because of fear of the rising water, and lastly, I kept thinking of what will the character do next in the movie.(I told you, I was only half focused) Well, the last one wasn't really that of a worry, it was more of a curiosity I guess.

So I slept around 2am after finishing the movie, arranging all the appliances' plugs, and after a few things to attend to. :) Before going to sleep I read Yeat's Poem, "when you are old" just to have my daily dose of poetry and as a promise to someone. I said I'll read it so I did. There, promise kept (haha! I know you'll be laughing when you read this). Anyway again, I slept at around 2am and the weather was banging hard on our house and on the neighbor's GI roof. (GI means galvanized Iron, Yero in Filipino) It was really noisy and scary but what the heck, the cold bed and the warm cushion plus the pillows really made all the difference between keeping awake because of the noise and dozing off.

My brother woke me up a while ago with his feet banging the wooden floor, and still, the neighbor's roof crumpling with the wind. I want to scream at them and tell them, "get a new roof! Istorbo! Sarap-sarap matulog magiingay yang bubong nyo!" well, that was me screaming at them in my mind. Sorry I really hate their roof, it creates so much when winds are gusting and it's scary to say the least.

Well, I'll try to get some sleep again... and hopefully the GI roof of out neighbor would stay low. Or else.

au revoir!

It's really boring at home.

2009-10-30T11:09:00.002+08:00

A few days 'til the start of registration and finally I'm bored at home. It's not that I'm not doing anything, but going through each day encountering the same stuff over and over again will really get to your nerves.

I turned on the TV when I woke up a few hours ago. The first channel that the TV was tuned into was ANC(for a reason I really do not know because when I slept, it was on AXN) and there is a segment about Former President Estrada, okay, Erap in the morning, that's like waking up to a nightmare. So I decided to just channel scroll and I came to watch a replay of a show last night... What has this got to do with this post you may ask, well, my life has been on a replay since I started this school year. I know it is lame but I think I just noticed it now. My regular schedule seems to be wake up, turn on the TV, go to the CR, then morning rituals, then breakfast, then its either go to school, or turn the PC on to check mails. It's that routine everyday. Its sickening, trust me. Right now, I'm craving for a change of scenery. I want to go out, do something, or just go out and never return here. I just want a break from all things familiar - friends, family, environment, people.

IF I COULD ONLY DO THAT.

Oh well, I guess I'll just try to hide under a rock. It has been proven somewhat effective in trying to contain some kind of sanity once in a while but you know, once things go bonkers, any kind of rock won't shelter you from whatever is out there - living, or contrived. I guess I'm still trying to get rid one part of me.

'nuf said.

au revoir!

A whole new fresh start

2009-10-29T21:55:00.003+08:00

I'm back to blogger.

A lot of changes happened since I last posted an entry here, but it is a nice feeling to be back venting whatever emotions I may have into this blog of mine.

I want to go into the topic of changes, since a lot has happened. Change, as they say is inevitable, I actually agree with that. You can't really afford not to change, there will be always one thing in a person that will change even if 99% did not do so. Even as the blinking line appear right in front of me in search of words to type, there is change happening, one way, in another place. It maybe an insane thought but a line in a movie states "insanity? this is SPARTA(well, reality)"

Just a few days ago, I lined up, supposedly to register, together with my friend Angelo, in the Quezon City hall. The lines were terrible, the system was inefficient, and to put it simply, it was a complete failure of organization. But despite the death march-esque length of the lines, (which actually spanned the whole of matalino street - snaking back and forth) we were amazed at how these people take registering as a really serious thing. These people lined up for more than 5 hours to get a registration form, then lined up another 8 hours the next day to get their biometrics registered - talk about endurance. Aside from the spartan-like endeavor, we were amazed that there are still people who believe that change can still happen in this country. (no intentional reference to Pres. Obama)

I have to admit, for a time, I really lost faith in this country, its shitload of a political system, and the noontime shows parading poverty in its grandest. Who wouldn't right? You see people on TV parading themselves for money and actually being proud that they did not finish school? Sorry, I'm being in an elitist mood here but you see, I believe that if there is a will to do something, you'll do anything to accomplish that. For them, noontime shows are the solitary saving grace which will lift them from the status they are in. For them, the noontime shows are their way of income. It's a pity really, they are so fixated in the short-runs rather than the more important long-runs. Sorry, I digressed.

So these people line for so many hours to get registered. It's a nice thought actually, a thousand new voters getting ready to face the challenge of electing, no, dictating the future of this country. There are still people who believe that their vote counts. I just hope that come election time, lines won't be as harsh as the ones we experienced. Can change really happen in this country? Yes, I do believe so, if you would ask me, but it doesn't need a new leader to start that change. There is a weird feeling in the air that things will be shaken soon enough. The thinking of people will start to differ from the ordinary goings of the average Filipino. I guess, after all the crap we had undergone through, we are finally(yes, FINALLY) tired of taking any more shit from the people who were trying to lead(and use) the Filipinos.

We are a proud race, we have a rich history to die for. And we all believe that we will change everything soon enough...eventually...no matter how long

It starts within all of us. Believe in the thing called unity. Believe that change will happen. I really have to give it to the people who lined up. They are hopefully, the catalysts for change that we all need. Hopefully change will come upon us starting with those lines that should've been shorter if we did not cram for the deadline of registration - and that's just Quezon City. With lines like those, I'd rather stay home.

(upon seeing those lines, Angelo and I just decided to call it a day after lining up for 5 hours. Our short patience got the best of us. We both decide to register during summer or any other time without lines that stretch the horizon.)